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Crayon Box

Every morning I wake up, and my mind starts with one feeling. Then something in that thought process will make me think of something else, and then something in that thought process will make me think of something else, and so on, until the end of the day comes, and I am feeling all the things at once, creating a whole new feeling. Kind of like what you take box of crayons and shade in one color at a time, stacking them until you have black. That’s what I am feeling but not in the theme of black like depression or darkness, just more in the stacking of feelings so much so that it is a whole other feeling. I’ve been experiencing a build up of coexisting feelings for a year now, and they are all just swirling about waiting for me to grasp them long enough to be able to elaborate on them more.


Some topics on the forefront of my mind as I write this are:

  • Every second is divine intervention that we don’t die. Like its straight up miraculous that we don’t just die right where we stand. Lest we forget driving a car, or anything else that is dangerous that we do everyday.

  • For the longest time I thought I was looking for people who had integrity, but really, I was looking for people who consciously coexist. Also, here is an interesting read on the word “integrity.” Very worth it to read. Was a bit a mind blower to me. https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/integrity/#InteSelfInte

I've got so much more swirling around but those are the only two thoughts I've found ways to express. Life is such a weird journey.

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