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Inner Child

You know how people say they are worried about having kids in days like these? They fear all these wrong doings that will traumatized their child for forever. I realize that I am having that struggle with the little girl inside of me. She needs to come out. She needs to learn to be vulnerable again. But How? How do I tell her to live and love in this world where threats are everywhere? How do I prepare her for all the times guys find her Ass with their hand just because it's in arms reach. Or what about when they initiate sex at the end of the first date like it was the only reason they invited you to dinner? Or what if she is followed around in a Sporting Goods Store? She hasn't had ANY of these experiences because our entire life she has been locked up in a corner of my heart protected from all my brutally honest words that kept people at a distance. I see it in my body language. Arms don't feel comfortable hanging down by my side. I have to cross them. How do I uncross my arms and let a little light into her dark corner? Make me think about all the times I probably missed out on feeling loved because I was so preoccupied with protecting her. I am so sad. Literally feels like my heart is empty.

”Vivir Mi Vida” Marc Anthony (You guys should google the lyrics to this song)

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Trauma Response

The last month or so, out of nowhere, I found myself feeling very regressed in my growth and mental health. It was like I had time traveled to a frame of mind before I “did the work.” It was confusing


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